Friday, June 28: In the British movie, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, Judi Dench plays Evelyn Greenslade, a newly widowed housewife whose house must be sold to pay off her husband’s debts. She goes to India with a group of elderly British characters, whose motives for coming to India are as varied as their eccentric personalities. They choose to spend their retirement years at Sonny’s Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, a home for the “elderly and beautiful,” based on pictures on the hotel’s website. Upon arrival, they find the hotel to be quite dilapidated and mismanaged. Some of the characters embrace the experience, while others seem determined to be miserable.
While staying at the hotel, Evelyn keeps a blog of her activities. She narrates throughout, to her Day 51 moral at the end:
The only real failure is the failure to try.
The measure of success is how we cope with disappointment, as we always must.
We came here and we tried, all of us in our different ways.
Can we be blamed for feeling that we’re too old to change?
Too scared of disappointment to start it all again?
We get up in the morning. We do our best. Nothing else matters.
But it’s also true that the person who risks nothing does nothing. Has nothing.
All we know about the future is that it will be different. Perhaps what we fear is that it will be the same, so we must celebrate the changes.
Because as someone once said, “Everything will be all right in the end, and if it’s not all right, then trust me, it’s not yet the end.”
I know what Evelyn means about fearing that things will always be the same. I remember, as vividly as if it was yesterday, the last five years of my humdrum existence as a suburban housewife in northern Virginia. I remember driving around in the traffic of Virginia, running the same errands I always ran, going through the same old routines and feeling increasingly depressed and restless. I sat at stop lights in my car, listening to foreign music, thinking about my longtime dream of being a writer, and thinking that i would never have anything to write about. My life was so boring, so mundane. What would I ever have to say? And I would think, over and over during those last five years: Is this all there is? This is IT, for the rest of my life?
Something HAD to change, but at the time I didn’t know what. And it did change. I CAN’T say about myself that my only real failure is a failure to try. For I HAVE tried. I have tried, and for better or worse, my life has changed.
I am now coming to the end of my third year living and teaching abroad. Starting in March 2010, I spent one year in Korea, which I believed to be quite a hardship. I had a horrible 1 1/2 hour to 2 hour commute to work each way, in freezing cold or steamy hot weather, on dilapidated buses that seemed to have no discernible schedule. I shivered in my classroom during winter, huddled over a space heater in my winter coat, when the school refused to turn on the heat. Or alternately, I sweated profusely when they refused to turn on the air conditioning. I endured Korean food, which I never liked because of the grisly chunks of meat Koreans favor and the strong vinegar taste of kimchi that accompanied every meal. I was older than almost every other teacher there, and the oldest of all my friends and acquaintances. I had no attraction for Korean men, and they none for me. And I lived in what amounted to a college dormitory, a small room in which I could barely fit, much less entertain anyone.
Yet, while in Korea, I set out to explore a country that is quite isolated and not known for tourism. I looked through my trusty Moon Handbook and plotted travels through the country several times a month. I set out to discover new places and new experiences, if not outside of Daegu, then within the city. I enjoyed my friends Anna, Seth and Myrna, our small group of expats in a foreign land, as we spent evenings together either playing Ticket to Ride, watching movies, or eating dinner and singing in a Korean singing room called noraebang.
I learned not only to be alone, but to relish it. And I learned to be self-sufficient, independent, and adventurous. I also learned that I don’t generally enjoy events with random large groups of people, and that certain things about a culture, which one may find endearing on a short holiday trip, can become annoying with constant exposure. I found myself irritated by the Korean group mentality, and the inability of Koreans to accept individual differences in what is a truly conformist society. I found everyone’s black hair annoying, because it was often dyed even into old age. I remember being thrilled when I visited China and found old people with white hair. I found it frustrating that Koreans refused to try to speak English, even though they had been studying it for years, for fear of losing face. I was put off by their criticisms of my appearance, such as the fact that I didn’t dye my hair or that I had fat arms or a big nose, and their constant offering of unsolicited advice. I also found them extremely generous and giving of their time and their friendship. I found them to be hard-working and diligent and well-organized. And many of them knew how to enjoy life, with their love of partying, drinking and singing.
In Korea, I tried, in my way. It wasn’t everyone else’s way, as most other teachers were young and into partying and drinking into all hours of the night. I had to cope with disappointment, and I was able to do it. Things didn’t work out for me in relationships the way I would have liked. I got up in the morning and slogged my way through my horrible commute. I taught my students to sing “California Dreamin'” and Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” I made goofy faces to keep them laughing. I organized team competitions of Jeopardy. I did my best. I didn’t know what the future would hold, but whatever it held I knew would be different than the life I had before. It was most certainly different.
While in Korea, the only thing I could really think about was my desire to come to work in the Middle East. It’s a long story, but after September 11, 2001 I became intrigued, almost obsessed, by Islam and the Arab world. I wanted to understand this culture and I read every book I could get my hands on. Since Korea was my first time teaching ESL, I looked at it as putting in my time, adding to my resume, just so I could come to the Middle East.
I completed my Master’s degree in International Commerce and Policy in May of 2008. Most of my research was centered in analysis of economic and political issues in the broader Middle East, Afghanistan and Pakistan. One paper was titled Social Ramifications of U.S. Foreign Policy in Egypt. This was a collaborative effort with colleagues which also dealt with the political, economic, and the political-military consequences of U.S. policy in that country. My other research projects included Macroeconomic Prospects for Jordan and Free Trade in the Middle East: A Tool to Achieve Peace and Stability. I wrote about Women’s Empowerment as a Key to Economic Development in Afghanistan. I also wrote papers focused in other areas of the world, including Mexican Judicial Reform and its Effect on the Political and Business Climate. I studied Arabic from 2005-2007 (and not again since, despite living in an Arab country for nearly two years now!). And after going to Egypt, which I adored, for the month of July in 2007, I was determined to work in the Middle East.
I came to Oman in September, 2011, ten years after the horrible terrorist attacks on the World Trade Centers & the Pentagon. It seemed my dream to come to the Middle East had come true. But I found that the energy and chaos and liveliness I discovered, and loved, in Egypt is lacking in Oman. The Sultan has done a great job of bringing Oman into the modern world, but somehow the country is missing vitality. It seems to lack a sense of humor and, as the French say, a joie de vivre (joy of living), a cheerful enjoyment of life; an exultation of spirit. It wasn’t long before I became bored with the culture and irritated by its lack of respect for women, its acceptance of cheating and its lack of work ethic. I found Omani citizens’ sense of entitlement annoying, along with its dependence on wasta to get ahead, and its attitude that things will get done, insha’allah, whenever they get done. And then of course, there’s the weather. I love four distinct seasons in Virginia, particularly the fall, winter and spring. I’ve never been a fan of summer. Of course, Oman has year-round summer, and heat like I’ve never experienced. I hope I never experience it again.
I figured if I was going to be happy here, I would have to create happiness myself, and so I resorted to the thing I loved best in Korea, traveling with a camera in hand, and sharing my adventures on my blog. When I met Mario, it seemed I had found a like-minded friend who would do these things with me; his companionship increased my enjoyment exponentially. Again, as in Korea, my travels and explorations kept me sane, and less lonely. Besides my travels within the country, I spent my free time reading novels, watching movies, and plotting other travels through the region. While here in Oman, I have ventured to Jordan, Greece, Ethiopia, and Nepal. Before I return home, I will spend a month in Spain and Portugal.
I have tried to get the most out of my experiences while living abroad these three years. I discovered things about myself: I love to travel, to go out into far-flung corners of a place and explore it, on my own, with a camera in hand, and a willingness to share my experience with words. Like Evelyn from the Marigold Hotel, I thrive on the experience as much as possible, even though at times it can be a lonely existence and a physical and emotional struggle. I have found, disappointingly, that I can be quite intolerant of certain aspects of a culture, but then I guess I have always known that to some degree. I think I hoped by coming to live in a different culture, I would become more tolerant, more accepting, but I’m afraid the opposite has happened. I can’t understand why people set up restrictions in their society that hold them hostage, and under which they are bound to fail. I really dislike hypocrisy, which I find runs rampant in this country. That being said, as in Korea, I have met some wonderful Omanis, especially my students, who haven’t hesitated to show their love for me.
As far as work, I’ve realized certain requirements are of utmost importance. Needless to say, I haven’t found these things here: I want to be respected as a professional; I want autonomy to do my job using the experience I have accumulated. I don’t want to be treated as a robot doing someone else’s bidding, especially when I don’t agree with it theoretically. I want to be commended when I do a good job and appreciated for being dependable. I want to be free to speak on any subject in the classroom or any other job environment. I want to be able to use technology, which should be a given in this modern world. And most of all, I want to work with managers who will listen and respect their workers’ complaints and pay attention when a mass exodus of employees occurs.
Once I decide I am through with a job, or a person, or a place, that’s it for me. There is no turning back. Just like I said I would never again return to Korea, I can now say with utmost certainty that I will never return to Oman.
I’m NOT one of those people who is unrealistically optimistic, seeing the world always as a rosy, fragrant and heady place. I am realistic. I see things as they are, and sometimes I don’t like what I see. But often, I see a world full of beauty and kindness and adventure. I strive to see things that way; it’s just that I don’t always succeed. I can weigh both sides and put them on the scales so that they’re evenly balanced, the bad and the good. And I can take away an experience that changes me, even if it’s in an unexpected way.
Finally, after living abroad, I think I’ve come full circle. Now that fear I had that nothing would ever change has vanished in the haze. I know that I don’t have to feel stuck; I can change my life whenever I want. That old familiar life has some appeal to me now and I find myself yearning for those familiar routines, those familiar faces.
Now, I feel like one of my favorite characters, Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Standing in Oman with my eyes closed, clicking my heels together, saying: “There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home.”
Once I return home to the USA, I will post some random thoughts periodically about my experience in Oman, but for the most part, this blog will be a closed book. I will post about my trip to Spain and Portugal in in search of a thousand cafés. When I return to America on July 25, you can find me at nomad, interrupted. I hope you’ll join me there, because I plan to be there for a long, long time. 🙂
sarahhedonista said:
I very rarely read a long post all the way to the end without skimming, but I did so with this one. I loved your open descriptions of your criticisms of both countries. Both seemed understandable and forgivable. I adore your firm decisiveness, which from some people can come across as closed minded, but in your case seems forged from experience. I’m looking forward to reading your words on Spain.
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much for your kind words, sarahhedonista. I figure some people will get very defensive about what I have to say, so your comment means a lot. People who travel experience something entirely different from people who live in a place. Some people have a great experience and others don’t. It’s all up to the individual’s cumulative experience; I hope no one takes offense, but it is my experience. That’s really all I can speak about, isn’t it? 🙂
Beauty Along the Road said:
Cathy – this post really helps me understand you and your point of view. I am so looking forward to talking about some of the issues you addressed in here, in person, once you are back in VA.
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much, Annette. I look forward to it too. 🙂
Vee Martin said:
Hi Cathy!
I have enjoyed your Omani blog and look forward to hearing about your travels in Spain and Portugal before your return to the States. I am sure that your experiences will have added enormously to your world view and opened your mind to a better understanding of other cultures. Nevertheless, I understand your need to return to your roots and the places where you feel most comfortable.
I have visited many of the places you have been to whilst on your travels, but only as a tourist, and as you say, there is a vast difference between a short visit and living in a foreign country. But I did rather get the feeling from your Omani blog that whilst you lived there you did not have much interaction with local Omanis, and that although you made some good friends with some of the ex-pats, your stay was coloured by some rather unsatisfactory arrangements with the Nizwa University authorities. Or am I being unfair?
I have tried to visit those countries I felt were ethically sound, which were governed well and respected human rights. So often I returned home to be confronted with the opposite: Sri Lanka and the Tamils, ongoing discrimination in South Africa despite the enormous changes made, tax evasion in Greece etc etc. I have come to the conclusion that no society is perfect and if I were to rigidly follow the above criteria, I would never go anywhere! My daughter lives in the States and I was dreading my first visit as nothing about US society seemed to appeal to me. I was therefore agreably surprised to find if nothing else that the openess and friendliness of people in general was in great contrast to that of many people in the UK, where I live, and it really brought home to me how easy it is to hold prejudices which bear little relation to the reality of many situations. I am working on being more open-minded to new experiences.
Good luck in Iberia!
Vee
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks for your comments, Vee. They’re very thoughtful. I agree it is easy to make generalizations about cultures, and often those generalizations are proven wrong. However, these things do become stereotypes for a reason; often there is some truth to them. It is good to be open minded; I was very open-minded going into each experience. But it’s funny how long a year lasts when things about that culture start to wear you down. Honestly, the Omanis in the university improved with time, while the expats in administration were the worst of the lot. Sadly, the expats had great influence over the Omanis. As far as not knowing the locals, I knew my students very well, as we spent 20 hours a week together. Generally I loved my students, except for a few who weren’t motivated, felt entitled, and had bad attitudes, but you can find a makeup of students like this in any culture, even in the U.S.
In any case, both of those cultures were certainly interesting experiences, but not places where I could stay for a long time. I realized I miss my Western world and I am thankful every day that I was lucky enough to be born where I was born. It is just the luck of the draw, right? Being in Barcelona, I am so in love with the weather, the individualism of Europeans, and the relaxed lifestyle of Europe. And the freedom! Lucky you to be from Britain. Anywhere in Europe is highly appealing to me! 🙂
KvK said:
My favourite blog so far! On certain matters, though, I thought you were extremely diplomatic!!! But it brought a few tears to my eyes, too! Am copying the movie quote, thank you for transcribing it. For you now, Oman is in the past. Your immediate future is in Barcelona and Portugal, and I am happy for you, my friend, as you set course for home. Salut!!!!
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much for your words of support, KvK. I’m so enjoying the European lifestyle. Honestly, I could stay here forever. 🙂
aesthomas281 said:
Thank you for writing your blog, for your honesty, and for being you. I will be watching your other blogs, and for your book to be published. I will miss knowing that you are in Nizwa. But I greatly admire you and your journey, and your ability to share it so deeply.
catbirdinoman said:
Thank you so much, Anne! I’ll miss you too, but I really hope we can meet again in the USA! Sometimes I may be too honest for my own good. But I feel like what’s the point of writing if I’m not going to share and be true to myself. Your words are so very kind! 🙂
Ron said:
Hope you have a good future and I have enjoyed your blog. Keep us up to date on your travels and I’ll check out all your places and sites on “Youtube.”
I still think you should contact either PBS, Anthony Bourdain (No Reservations) or Rick Steeves Travel. You have alot to offer and who knows, mabe your own PBS travel show. You have alot to offer and are good what you do.
Take care and have fun.
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much, Ron. I’ll continue blogging, so just follow from the Europe and the USA end if you feel like continuing. There is much more in my blogs than on YouTube. I will definitely contact PBS and others. Maybe it’s just my lack of confidence, but I’m highly doubtful they would think me anything special. It’s kind of you to think so, though. 🙂
Ron said:
Whatever happens, keep up the good works!!!
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks, Ron!
Carol said:
You broke out of the “suburban housewife” mold in a way most of us could only dream of; you experienced life in different lands. These experiences, the good and the bad, have opened many doors for you – both literal and figurative. I suspect you will find dysfunction in any country just as you will in any neighborhood, any famly. Interesting, I think, your experiences with the Koreans – when Kat and I visited Geoff there, we found them to be very helpful and accommodating. Perhaps that’s the difference between residing and visiting.
I wish you the best in your future endeavors!
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much for your comments, Carol. You’re so kind. They were great experiences, and I’m really thankful that I was able to have them. As far as Koreans, most were very kind and accommodating. They’re also of a collective mentality which becomes hard to ignore, and to take, over time. Generally, I had some great experiences there, just as I did in Oman, but I am just ready to go home!
sybil said:
I too tend to skim overly long posts, but not this one. You know yourself so well. That is marvellous. You’ve experienced great change in your life and have triumphed. I look forward to hearing how you feel about your experiences once you’re back on this side of the pond. Safe travels.
BTW — I love your hair … and you have a lovely smile.
catbirdinoman said:
Thank you so much for your kind comments, Sybil. Each day, I hope to learn something about myself. I think we all do. I don’t know that I’ve always triumphed; sometimes life is a struggle, but at least I try. I hope I will always keep going and not give up on life, as some people do. 🙂
crazytraintotinkytown said:
You’re right Cathy there is no place like home but it’s still nice to dream. Btw loved that film as well in fact, I never tire of it
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks, Dallas. I love to dream, and I will always love to travel. I just miss the familiar and my family. And four seasons! 🙂
Robin said:
I love this post, Cathy. It says so much about you, and what a courageous, beautiful person you are. 🙂 Looking forward to following your journey at home.
P.S. I saw that movie recently and really enjoyed it.
catbirdinoman said:
Thank you so much, Robin, for your kind words. I’m enjoying Spain right now, but am also very much looking forward to being home. 🙂
Hilary Davidson said:
Cathy, I have enjoyed reading your blog very much, and especially the beautiful photographs taken in Oman. As one of the earlier commentators said, it seemed you were unlucky in not getting to know more Omanis well. Although one shouldn’t generalise, I have always found the Omanis wonderful, friendly people and was incredibly lucky enough to have been invited into their homes and to take part in their weddings etc.. Working with non-Western expatriates was also a joy and I made lifelong friends during my time in Oman which I left 14 years ago but am about to return to. Of course Omani ways are different to those of the Western world, but that is different, not worse, as a rule. Certainly the young female students I met there were generally much happier than the young women one comes across in England! You left the US unhappy and bored with your life there. I wonder whether when you return, after the initial excitement of being back has worn off, you won’t find in a little while that you are back in the same rut and seeking new adventures again…..The people you are with can make or break your impression of a place – your early blogs were so positive and I’m sorry things didn’t work out for you. I hope I am as lucky this time when I live in Oman as I was before.
Best wishes, H
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comments, Hilary. I got to know many Omanis well and also went to weddings, etc. but the culture just wasn’t for me. I hope you have a great return and enjoy your time there again. 🙂
mrscarmichaelmrscarmichael said:
Oh, Cathy I think we’re soul mates but you are braver.
catbirdinoman said:
Yes, I think you just might be right about the soul mate part, but probably not about the “braver” part. 🙂
dadirri7 said:
gosh, i read through without skimming too .. fascinating, so honest and informative … how marvellous that ife has transformed, no more boredom, once an adventurer always an adventurer … things will look so different when you are back home, when you have that expat view … yes I loved the Marigold Hotel too … we are just back from 6 weeks in the Kimberley, really far away wilderness in the north west of Australia … so much to digest 🙂
catbirdinoman said:
I think it’s great that you took that extended trip, Christine. I can’t wait to read about it. Sadly, I was so stressed with packing up stuff to ship home from Oman and wrapping up things at work, and preparing for my trip, I haven’t had time. But I will get to all those posts that are just waiting for me!
dadirri7 said:
i understand completely … just relax … we have had so much to do since arriving home … so much unexpected stuff taking up our time … i have barely begun to catch up on blogging 🙂
catbirdinoman said:
I will do just that, Christine. Good luck settling back in yourself. 🙂
ruthincolorado said:
Cathy, I am so glad that you have left Oman. I’ve really enjoyed your blog and “accompanying” you on your travels, and I’ve sensed that you have been ready to move on for some time now. So glad that you had the courage to follow your dreams and reach for the stars! Can’t wait to hear about this month’s travels. 🙂
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much, Ruth! I’m really glad I’ve left Oman too. I’m so happy to get back to the Western world. You’re right, I’ve been ready for the last 9 months! 🙂
adinparadise said:
What a wonderful sharing post, Cathy. You’ve done some very courageous things in your life, and had some great achievements. Kudos to you my friend. I wish you well as you return home to your family. I absolutely love your smile. It’s infectious, and always makes me smile too when I see you in a photograph. xx
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much, Sylvia. I see them as courageous, yes, but as far as great achievements…. well, I wish! Thanks so much for the compliment; I really can’t wait to see my children again. My daughter is in Italy right now with her dad and stepmother and half brothers. But I’ll see her after July 25! 🙂
Constance said:
As an expat that stayed abroad long enough to learn that I had none of the answers, it took a couple of years to realize that I had not even understood the QUESTIONS. As many expats from various countries will amit, one is therefore totally put off by fellow countrymen in the form of tourists or politicians that visit a country for a week or a few days and feel qualified to diagnose and prescribe. And it’s inevitably done in public in high volume.
In a word it is “cringeworthy.”
Your blog is enjoyable in many ways. Some of it a bit introspective for my tastes but other times exquisite in expressing sentiments that ring true for anyone living abroad for any length of time. One phrase that stands out was one you made regarding South Korea. In it you candidly admitted that “even the black hair annoyed me.” It said it all! Maybe those living in Sweden or Norway eventually get tired or even feel annoyance regarding blondes and schnapps and snow?
Having said that I must also add that eturning home was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
My passport said I belonged where I was …. but my heart remained on the other side of the world. People had changed — or more correctly I definitely had — and no one wanted to hear what I had to say unless I was willing to discuss football, inane television offerings, or suburbia. One or two might ask where I came from but if I answered as to where I had been for nearly a decade their response was “I’ll bet you are glad to be out of THERE.”
It took no time at all to be annoyed with television, too much air conditioning, windows that won’t open, parents that value career over family, news programs that flat out lie and mislead those that trust them.
Re entry is tough, but if you can somehow use all you have learned to help those that rely too much on the mainstream media fill in the gaps, that’s good. The work ethic here does not allow for enough free tim to see the world in a leisurely fashion, so If you can help the masses to realize that they aren’t getting the full story about anything anywhere on the news … you will have made a difference.
That’s my opinion. Not that you asked.
catbirdinoman said:
Thanks so much for all your comments, Constance. And thanks for visiting as well! Living abroad definitely has its challenges AND its rewards, but no matter how hard it is, or the amazing adventures offered, it definitely changes you. Some of the changes are good, some are bad. But you can’t go home as the same person you were when you left.
I do worry about reverse culture shock for all the reasons you mention and more; what really gets to me is that no one is really interested in my experience abroad, or maybe I should say very few people are. I remember going home last summer and meeting my sister and my family and all they talked about was themselves and never asked me anything about Oman or Korea. I find it really weird and annoying. It’s hard to assimilate back into American culture when most people have never left their own backyards; I really dread being subjected, as you say, to talk about sports or all the possessions people have accumulated, or of any number of other pretentious things, when I’ve had such a rich experience that no one wants to hear about.
Actually, of all my family and friends back home, hardly anyone even reads my blog. I realized long ago that I’m doing it just for myself, as a kind of diary so I’ll remember what I thought and felt about the whole experience. Thus the introspection, which will always continue to be part of my blogging and for which I don’t feel any need to apologize. That’s who I am, after all. 🙂
I’ll be happy to share my experience and my thoughts with anyone who cares to listen, but I don’t plan to be on any kind of soapbox trying to set people straight. If people want my opinion, I’ll be happy to share, but I’m not going to be blatant or pushy about it. I’m more of the writing than the speaking type. I will just sit back and see how people’s interactions with me will change, or not, upon my return.
Here’s one of my favorite quotes: “Do not chase people. Be you and do your own thing and work hard. The right people who belong in your life will come to you, and stay.” ~ Wu Tang
This quote is something I’ll carry with me as I return. I realize I may have to build a different network of friends because I’m a different person than I used to be; and many of my old friends may not “fit” any longer!
We’ll see how life is back home; some people say it takes years to feel “at home” again after being abroad. I can’t help but wonder how long before I get the urge to wander again! 🙂
KvK said:
It will take approximately 6 – 8 weeks for the travel bug to bite you again. I would bet on it. 😀
catbirdinoman said:
Maybe you’re right. We’ll see… 🙂
Rachael Schmidt said:
Wow! I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog! I’m considering a teaching job in Oman and you’ve given me LOTS to think about! Thank you!!
catbirdinoman said:
Great Rachael, I’m glad you’ve enjoyed it. Good luck teaching in Oman; it will definitely be an experience! 🙂
Miranda Metheny said:
I so appreciate your honesty and candor. Refusing to see (or is it only to discuss?) the negatives is something I see a lot with bloggers and other travel writers, and it’s definitely a form of stereotyping and blindness of its own. I feel like you’ve really looked hard and learned a lot about both yourself and others, what you like, what you don’t, etc. Thank you for sharing. 🙂
catbirdineurope said:
Thank you so much for your kind comments, Miranda. I think too many expats living abroad are all starry-eyed when they get to a new culture; while it’s great to try to see the positives, it’s also realistic to understand the negatives as well. You’re a very insightful person! I’ll try to catch up on your posts about living and studying abroad when I return to the USA; I’m in Lisbon for my last day and then I fly home tomorrow, so I need to take advantage of my last day of travel. Thanks too for joining my blogs! I hope we’ll have further conversations. 🙂
Ignacio Duran said:
Hello Cathy,
I’ve enjoyed reading a great part of your blog here; hopefully you still get notices on the posts and can reply to me, preferably by email: igiduran at gmail dot com
Well, again, I admire your writing and nice photos, too. I have a completely different trajectory but I’ve also been to Korea, and have taught for over 33 years in Japan, Germany, Spain, the USA, and now I’m hoping to get to Oman (or some other such place in the area) within the next couple of years. Actually, the sooner the better, but if it takes a couple of years, that will be fine, too. I’m biking (yes, bicycle) and in the last 18 months I’ve done about 16.000 km through 12 countries. I’m now in Poland.
If you could point me one way or the other in Oman… but the thing is, I would like to leverage my other languages and skills as well (not just teaching, but translating and interpreting, and not only English but Spanish, French, German, and Japanese). Of course, I’m interested in learning Arabic but I’m a beginner, although I’ve learned the writing system or alphabet already quite well (two long stays in Morocco and Tunis).
Hope to hear from you! Good luck and much fun in Spain and Portugal. I’m half-Spanish myself. By the way, you can find my CV in iduran.com
Ciao,
Ignacio
catbirdineurope said:
Hello Ignacio, Sorry it’s taken me so long to reply, but with getting ready for my first semester back at Northern Virginia Community College and my first week of classes, I’ve barely had a moment to breathe. You do know I’m no longer in Oman, right? I’m not sure how I’d be able to help you.
I think it’s great that you’re bicycling all over Europe. What a dream come true! Sounds fabulous. I’d be curious to know how you support yourself doing that!
It looks from your CV like you have many different abilities with languages, so I would think you could find jobs anywhere. I don’t know, however, where you could find work in translation, especially in Oman if you’re not fluent in Arabic.
I loved Spain and Portugal and would love to live there, but as I have no language skills in either Spanish or Portuguese, and no EU passport, I think it could be, to say the least, challenging. I’ll send my email address to yours, but I’m not really sure how I could help you! 🙂
cj said:
I’ll be working in Oman as a kindergarten teacher and I read your blog without ceasing for insights on my future life in the gulf. May I ask your advice about what to wear in Oman? Will I be all covered up from head to toe? I need your expert advice. Thanks and I love that you narrate your experiences as they are without sugarcoating them. Keep on telling your story!!!!
catbirdineurope said:
Hi cj, Here’s a post I wrote about what people wear to the University of Nizwa. Maybe you can get an idea from this: https://catbirdinoman.wordpress.com/2012/10/07/a-glimpse-at-what-teachers-wear-to-the-university-of-nizwa-fall-2012/
I’ve left Oman now and won’t be returning, but I hope you can find some good things on my blog, which is now a closed book. Good luck!
Alana said:
I really enjoy reading your blog. Like you, I endured teaching in South Korea (spent years and 10 months there) and I am relieved that I closed that chapter. I really want to try teaching ESL in the middle east. I am curious about qualifications for teaching ESL. I am not a certified teacher, just a BA +TEFL. Can you share how you found an ESL position. I read from your blog that you also have a MA. Thanks 🙂
catbirdineurope said:
Hi Alana,
Just to let you know, if I had the opportunity to teach in Asia again, I would jump at it. The Middle East pays well, but the students are very difficult to deal with. I do have an MA, but it is in a totally unrelated subject: International Commerce and Policy. I understand they are now looking for MAs in Linguistics or ESL; I’m not sure I could even get a job there now that I’ve left. There are many places you might be able to get a job with a BA and TEFL, and experience. I’d still go ahead and try. I applied directly through the University of Nizwa, which I found on Dave’s ESL Cafe. Good luck!
Pingback: introducing new members of the blogging community ~ my esl advanced writing workshop | nomad, interrupted
chiefmadapple said:
Enjoyed your honesty recorded here- most people would try to sugarcoat things … but that’s how you saw and felt about your experience there and no one can or should convince you of otherwise.
Refreshing 🙂
catbirdinchina said:
Thank you so much for your kind words, Chief Madapple. I try hard to be honest in my posts about my experiences abroad as I don’t see much point in sugarcoating them. I know many people do try to be ultra-positive about their expat experiences, and I do try to see the positive as much as I can, but I just can’t help being honest. I’m really glad for your vote of confidence. It’s been a long time since I wrote this, but I do remember I did take some criticism about some of my negative comments in the post. Thanks again. 🙂