Sunday, July 15: Here are Cee’s Life Questions for this week:

Which would you prefer:  a wild, turbulent life filled with joy, sorrow, passion, and adventure–intoxicating successes and stunning setbacks; or a contented, bordering-on-happy, secure, predictable life surrounded by friends and family without such wide swings of fortune and mood?

In theory, what I would love is the wild, turbulent life filled with adventure, passion and joy!!  The problem is that a wild turbulent life must be accompanied by the horrible downs, the sorrows, the stunning setbacks, the huge disappointments.  Emotionally, I don’t think I’m strong enough to handle the downs, especially for any extended period of time.  I think deep inside I know I have to be protective of that fragile emotional side of myself, thus I tend to gravitate to the secure and predictable. Even though it generally bores me to death!  I am a restless soul, but my restlessness just leads me to another location where I find more of the same! 😦

This question really hits home because I actually left the secure, happy, predictable life I had in Virginia in search of those highs and lows, that passion and sorrow.  I wanted to really feel passionately and strongly about EVERYTHING!!  Yet.  I’m coming to realize that maybe I’m incapable of it.  Because it ends up, no matter where I escape, there is still my inner self clinging to a safe harbor. Maybe I’m just made this way and really can never escape this deep truth.

Would you like to be famous?  In what way?

I don’t really care about being famous, but I would like to be the kind of writer, especially as a fiction (novel or short story) writer, that when people read my stories and meet my characters, they say, “I know exactly what she’s talking about! I can relate to this experience, this feeling!  This character is so quirky and so utterly cool and fascinating.”

If you could cure one disease, what would that be?

Mental illness.  Of all kinds.  My own family and many families I know have suffered the devastating effects of depression, anxiety, and even more serious mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder & paranoid schizophrenia.  I have known people who have committed suicide or attempted to do so.  I myself have suffered with anxiety, depression and panic attacks. I don’t wish this on anyone.  I’d rather have a physical illness any day.

If you were invisible, where would you go? 

This is a ridiculous answer, but lately I’ve been watching the TV series Brothers & Sisters.  And I think because of this, I’ve been having dreams about Senator Robert McCallister, who is played by Rob Lowe.  So, I’d like to follow him around to see what his life is really like!!

On a less ridiculous note, I think if I were invisible, I would just continuously hop on airplanes and travel at whim all over the world.